GAYs IN THE NAVY: A Seman's (I mean Seaman) Tale

I am going to start a new series in which I re-cap my 10 years experience in the United States Navy.  As memorable moment come to mind, I will write about it my this blog.

Back Flash - Why I joined the Navy:

After my freshman year of college ended I realized that yes I was indeed gay.  I had not had sex with a guy yet but I knew 100% that I was emotionally, physically and  sexually attracted to men.  I was living in one of the most promiscuous cities at the time (Washington DC).  It seemed like everyone was messing around in the parks, sex clubs, behind building, any place you could think of doing it.  Because it was not socially acceptable yet to be "out" most guys blended into heterosexual society and messed around on the side. It is the 1986, everyday on the new they are talking about this "gay cancer" later re-named HIV/AIDS.  I have always been afraid of death, and gay men were dropping like flies.  I remember going out to the club (yes I was going out to gay clubs but not having sex....hard to believe but true) and lusting after a hot guy on the dance floor and 6 months later the guy was dead.  I never wanted to be gay and I definitely did not want to die.  So I was at wits end trying to figure out what should I do make myself heterosexual so that I would not get HIV and die.  So, instead of going back to college I joined the Navy.

Back Flash - My First Duty Station

I checked into my first duty station.  I had 2 seabags and 3 duffel bags (maybe that was a signal to the gay men on board).  A very cute Sailor meet me at the pier and assisted with my bags - there was a strong sexual tension between us (more about that in another blog).   I unpacked my bag and made my new sleeping quarter (my bunk) feel like home.  Then I was given a tour of the ship about an extremely freckled red head that seemed to know everyone.  I felt like a "piece of meat" as he introduced me to his "boys".  I later found out that the purpose of the tour was to show me off and we were in search of the "queen of the ship".

Queen of the Ship - Definition: The rumored gay guy on the ship (everyone thinks/knows he is gay and they are cool with it because he is soo cool).  Also has been on the ship longer than any of the other gay guys on the ship.  The Queen of the Ship can give you the 411 on all the men (do's and don't).

We find the "Queen of the Ship".  He is 5' 10", 38 years old, muscular body, best ass around, masculine but does gay stuff for shock value and everyone seemed to respect him.  His name is David, and right then and there he take me under his wings and officially becomes my "Gay Mother".  Mother because he is a bottom.  Mind you I am only 18 years old.  That night he took me out to the base club (Mother did not go to gay clubs).  And we sit in a booth and he told me about each and every guy on the ship.  The ones to stay away from, the ones you must know, gay slang, and how to stay in the Navy undetected and just basic rules of survival.  Here are a few:

1. Don't "punk out" on base or on the ship.  People can think whatever they want just don't give them evidence.
2. Don't kiss and tell - NEVER
3. Never ask another sailor if they are gay. 
4. If you mess around with a guy that considers myself straight - enjoy the sex and leave your heart at home.
5. Never let a guy you are messing around with borrow money or use your car - that is a tell-tale sign the guy is using you.
6. Don't respond or react to rumors - don't let them see you sweat.
7. When asked "Are you gay" always respond "No".

He taught me soo much, I don't want to bore you guys, but stay tuned for more stories.

The main thing I want you guys to understand is that, the gay men in the military are like their own secret fraternity.  We are brother.  We are family.  I have not meet one gay man that joined the military because they were out to transform straight guys or just looking for sex.

So, David where ever you are.....I am glad you are the first gay person I ever meet.  Thanks for teaching me all about the gay life.  I was in Navy before "Don't Ask - Don't Tell".  When I first joined the Navy, you could be discharged for the suspicion of being gay and receive an dishonorable discharge.  Thanks David, for keeping me safe.

Stay tuned for more stories to come.