BISEXUAL
DL
Whatever you want to call it, it equates to a person who enjoys sex with both men and women.
The Gay Community has mixed feeling about if someone is truly bisexual. Some gays might say “pick one”. Some might say “you are gay and just in denial or not ready to come out”. Some might say “Being Bisexual is just a stepping stone to becoming fully gay”. I have a totally different view. I believe there are some who are truly heterosexual. Some who are fully homosexual. And yes some who are truly bisexual. Sexuality is not just Black and White. There is a lot more Gray then most will admit.
For quite some time I have noticed on various websites (Criagslist, Manhunt, Adam4Adam) a demand for guys who consider themselves Straight or Bi. And some want guys who are married. Some gay men have gone soo far as to falsely advertise themselves as Straight or Bi in order to attract others who claim they are also straight or Bi. That aspect does bother me, just because I hate a liar. Don’t fucking purposely mislead me. If I like you - I like you rather you are gay, straight, or bisexual. Hot is hot. And being straight it not better than being gay.
It is amazing to me how women have no problems in talking about their physical and/or sexual attraction to other women. And they will even tell you they have “experimented” in the past. But men, will never admit that they are physically and/or sexually attracted to another man. I believe in the core of my heart that people are more Bisexual than Heterosexual. I have had sex with both and enjoyed it immensely.
Earlier I was reading Breeding Jock’s blog http://www.breedingjock.com/ and his entry about a married, bi guy reminded me about some of my past experiences with Bi or Straight men.
In my experience I have noticed that with Bi mean they will fuck any pussy. Pussy is pussy. But they are extremely particular about the guy they mess around with. Some Bi men look at:
· Level of masculinity (some like a guy who is not as masculine as they are or they want a guys who is at their same level or masculinity but definitely don’t want a guy that is more masculine then they are).
· Height (Don’t want a guy taller than me)
· Weight (Don’t want a guy who is bigger than )
· Body hair (prefer smooth)
· Privacy / discretion / trust (They must believe you will tell anyone)
Most of the Bi/Straight men I have encountered are only interested in getting a bj or topping. They are not into kissing or reciprocating orally or bottoming. And never do you talk about emotions or talk about being gay.
The times I have encountered a Bi guy that wanted to give me a kiss or bj, In the back of my mind I always considered him gay.
In my experience when gay and bi men play together it is definitely about fantasy for the gay guy. For the Bi/Straight guy it is more about being serviced / worshipped.
In my experience Bi/Straight guys do not go to gay clubs. And rarely will they not frequent gay website and if they do there is not face pix available and he will not email it to you.
I have a lot of experience with men who consider themselves Bi or straight. My first lover of 2 years considered himself Straight. And as of today, he is married with two kids and claims I am the first and only man he has ever had sex with. (more about this story in another blog entry – I hinted about him in my Gays in the Navy – Part 1).
In a perfect world, we would not have terms such as homosexual, heterosexual or bisexual. IF society was not soo uptight and quick to label people, I feel more people would just consider themselves “sexual”.
Thanks for the shout out Master!
ReplyDeleteYes, this is an interesting topic. And very divided unfortunately.
I like being sexual too!
Men are just sexual, no need for another term (i.e. prefix).
ReplyDeleteI have been married for the past 20 years. I do not consider myself str8 by any stretch of the imagination, and I really h8 str8 sex. Would love to find a boyfriend again if it did not threaten my marriage, because I cannot take care of myself alone (I would be indigent). My wife has Temporal Lobe Epilepsy and I take care of her. She has zero libido and so do I. I am 56 and she is 54. We have been best friends for 35 years. It's comfortable, though not sexual, and we prefer that. Men are "sexual", there is no need to say bi- or homo- or hetero- or metro- or anything else. Men are purely sexual creatures.
ReplyDeleteWell, when I was younger the Kinsey Scale was in vogue (0=Totally hetero / 10=totally homo). With 10% of the population at either end that leaves 80% to be scattered through the rest of the scale. As a mentor of mine used to say: Pick a number and get on with your life.
ReplyDeleteif i had to label myself i would be bi sexual completly bi i could see myself marring a man or woman and live without the other the reason most men (black men) are DL is because we aren't allowed to have both because gays dont like it and str8s dont like it i have caught hell being bi because gay guys are so threaten by women or girls think i am gonna give them a disease or some shit does that sound fair?
ReplyDeleteJust found your blog. I'll follow it.
ReplyDeleteYou bring up some interesting points. And I agree.
If I were to get with a guy, I have very specific stringent requirements.
Chris
The French philosopher Michel Foucault, in his History of Sexuality, argued that we live not in an age of sexual liberation, but in an age of sexual repression -- a subtle form of repression, however, in that it works by forcing us to define our identity in terms of a preexisting conceptual system that has been devised for us by the triumphant psychotherapeutic establishment. Thus, a boy growing up in America today must constantly be asking himself, "Am I a homosexual or am I a heterosexual" -- an interior interrogation that no boys have ever been forced to enact. Is this liberation? Or is it psychological oppression of a peculiarly insidious nature?
ReplyDeletei am bi. i used to think our enemies were the str8 folk. but no. its the gay folk. especially the bottoms. they hate us. they think we are pretending. it gets worse when they use the term DL. its like a crime we are commiting, being 'insufficiently' homosexual. if only they cud be in our shoes.
ReplyDeleteyour article is quite true but also stereotyping cos some of what you describe i think has more to do with repression and being in the closet than being bi. i am bi. i have emotions. i am emotional with men or women. i will suck. i will go to a gay club. etc etc. yet i do not consider myself gay. i think its because i wont go the whole hog and some gay stuff just never appeals to me. think about it.
Blaxual: In regards to your comment. Because your mentioned having a emotional connection (not just sexual) I believe you might be truly Bi. Not that you need my authorization, permission or validation. You have nothing to prove to anyone. IF more people who are TRULY Bi came out and vocalized to both the men and women they are messing around with that they are Bi (and that it is more than sex but emotions as well), then and only then will Bi people be taken seriously. Just my opinion.
ReplyDeleteI personally would NEVER date a Bi guy (I would have sex with him only). I would not date him because I cannot compete against a women. I cannot give birth. We cannot walk down the street hand and hand safely. I cannot come to your company's Christmas party. I would always be your dirty secret sitting at home waiting for you to be able to get away from the girlfriend or wife.